In advance of butterfuly vomitus...

In advance of what might become a major turning point in my life, the life of my partner AND our dog's life, I'd like to thank the Universe.

That is, I'd like to thank the Universe in advance of anything...well...that might make me seem silly over the next few days.

I have a tendency to get silly when I am nervous. I smile a lot more. I laugh for seemingly, no good reason.  It gets awkward.  I'm kinda like a socially inappropriate chimpanzee.   I'll blame my genetic linkage to my chimpanzee cousins what with 96% of human DNA being identical to that of the chimpanzee.  

Human origins...whatcha gonna do?  Thanks for that, too Universe.

I promise not to start chucking rocks or fecal matter.  Cross my heart.  You can thank the Universe for that.

But holy smokes, am I nervous.  As a matter of fact, I think there could be butterfly vomitus (thanks Melissa, for the visual).  I imagine it would resemble a rainbow. A rainbow with wings...and antennae. 

I have to pick out clothes that can hide said butterfly vomitus.  What's the best kind of gum to chew when your breath smells like butterflies?  Something colourful, to hide the stains.

I thank the Universe for colourful, fruity gum. I thank the Universe for stain resistant, modern fibers. I thank the Universe for teaching me how to twirl a pen and bob my foot...so I can be nervous AND have a couple of "ticks" to fall back upon.

I thank the Universe for sending me on this journey of opportunity, no matter what happens. 

Just think of me as Unervous in the Universe. With rainbow butterfly wings on my tongue.

EEP.

Ouroboros

On the eve of the biggest event in my life thus far (besides my birth), the eve of my long-anticipated thesis defense, I sit and I reflect...

My mind can't help but wander to moments and people that have meant so much to me and without whom I wouldn't be here. I wouldn't be in this place. I would never have sought more for myself. I would never have even considered I was capable of more...

I was never supposed to finish high school. I wasn't supposed to be smart. I was supposed to turn out as expected...as a disappointment. I was supposed to be limited, not only by my birth into a complex and troubled family, but also to be limited by myself.

But because of one person, early on, who always pushed me, believed in me, stuck up for me, loved me and saw something in me that no one else did - I am here. I am sitting here, on the eve of my Master of Arts in Gerontology thesis defense, reflecting on her.

I am thanking her for every moment she put into me, for every kind word, for every stern word, for every moment she made me shine, for every moment she made me feel safe and for every moment she reinforced that I was worth more than I thought and that I was capable of more than I ever imagined.

I am thanking her for every window she opened after so many doors closed on me.

I am thanking her for loving me like I was her very own.

Marjorie Geldard Glover, of Houwden Clough in Yorkshire, U.K., thank you for everything. I'll be toasting you tomorrow night, as we share in the celebration together. I'll raise a glass of pink champagne and thank every lucky star in the sky, that when I was falling, you were there to catch me.

I love you. I hope I have made you proud.